I feel like I am insane for even writing this post but I need to sort out some things in my own mind and writing them down may help me to sort them out.  Hyperemesis Gravidarum was, without a doubt the worst experience I have ever been through, so why on earth would I consider going through it again?

Am I crazy for considering a Hyperemsis Gravidarum second pregnancy?

I have, this last week or so, for some reason started wondering what Boo is going to miss out on by not having siblings in a typical sense.  I have also read several blog posts which feature the amazing bond between siblings and it has really struck a nerve with me.  She does have two half brothers but they live in another country and for reasons beyond our control which I do not really want to go in to Boo will not, in all likelihood, have much of a ‘sibling’ relationship with them.

I feel like there is a whole list of questions I need to answer;

1. Am I insane for even considering a second pregnancy which could mean I suffer with HG again? A Hyperemesis Gravidarum second pregnancy – I am not sure I can even wrap my head around it.

2. If I do suffer with HG do I try to take medication preemptively to try to make the symptoms managable?

3. What about the about the consequences of 2. if I do take the medication? And not just consequences but guilt

4. If I chose not to take the medication how will I cope with looking after Boo and myself while suffering with this?

5. What is Boo missing out on by not having a sibling? And is this ‘worth’ suffering HG again.

6. Will Boo not be missing out on anything because she will not know any difference?

7. Will I be able to cope with 2 babies?

8. If we do decide to go ahead then when is the ‘right’ time? When Boo is more independent/older or when Boo is too young to be able to remember?

9. No, really, am I insane for even considering a second HG pregnancy?

10. I feel insane (I know that’s not a question)

I know there are probably a lot more questions and things to think about, but this seems like an overwhelming list as it is!

What I need to do, I think, is chat to some other ladies who have had 2 or more HG pregnancies and get their thoughts on it.

The Wanderer Returns…

Look what I found… two days later, in the leaves and crap at the side of the road. And no, I did not get funny looks from the cars driving by as I picked it up and then stopped to take a picture on a nearby bench!

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It seems like I have a problem?  Well that’s what I keep being told anyway. (Though whenever I try to read up on it I find that a lot of breastfeeding mothers do this and do not consider it a problem)… so is feeding to sleep a problem?

Is feeding to sleep a problem

Boo feeds to sleep, both for her day time naps at to sleep on an evening (and for the majority of her night time wakings as well. She is 9 months old.  I don’t have a problem with this, unless I worry about what everyone else is telling me – that it is wrong.

Boo is clearly not impressed at the thought of going to sleep without feeding!

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I don’t mind this really at the minute as I am on maternity leave, and I don’t mind devoting this time to Boo.  Most nights she is only up once of twice.  The issue is I suppose, when I am back at work in November for 2 long days each week. Obviously I am going to be unable to feed her to sleep for her daytime naps, and I don’t just want to carry on as we are until she starts nursery because that’s going to be a big shock for her.

I have been resistant to sleep training since a health visitor told me to just leave a 6 week old Boo in her Moses basket to cry after she had been fed/changed etc as ‘a crying baby is a healthy baby’ (something which I disagree with, I couldn’t leave my baby to cry without trying to comfort her.) It is a good job I didn’t do that as Boo was suffering from reflux and it would have been awful to leave her suffering alone.

So I am trying to find ways to get Boo to go in to her cot awake and settle herself to sleep. I know she can do this as sometimes when she wakes on a night she cries for about 5 seconds and before I get to her room she is back asleep.  However, I seem to be making little progress and sometimes it feels quite disheartening, short of getting her in the pram and walking her to sleep each nap (which I suppose is slightly better as someone else can do this whereas I am the only one who can feed Boo).

I guess I am reluctant to make major changes because then I will have to admit to myself that returning to work and leaving Boo is drawing ever closer. I am going to have to search a bit more for a method I agree with to help teach Boo how to self settle.  But for now, I don’t have a problem with feeding to sleep…

Zena's Suitcase 

When you become a parent everything changes, something you expect – like the sleepless nights and the constant nappy changes but there are a few things I didn’t expect…
11 surprising things about babies (0-9 months)
Here are a few of the things which have surprised me most during Boo’s first 9 months…
1. It really is amazing how little sleep you can survive on. (and I really mean survive on, not be polite and civil on)
2. After the 6 months mark and we started weaning Boo, I now really miss pre-weaning dirty nappies… who would have thought I would miss those runny poo-explosions… but I do, well compared to what we have now!
3. CBeebies cartoons are actually more addictive to watch than I probably should admit… My current faves are Raa Raa & Bing.
4.  Mummy brain really does exist… I have gone out without locking the door, but the milk in the oven instead of the fridge, gone out and forgot baby wipes (scary times!) and there are probably hundred more thing but my brain has kindly forgotten them.
5. Sneezing is hilarious. As is coughing. I did not know this until Boo showed me the light!
6. The changing table we bought was a waste of money… I always change Boo on a changing mat on the floor,
7. I thought random people coming up and touching your bump would be a thing of the past  when you gave birth, it just gets transferred, am I the only one who doesn’t feel comfortable with total stranger coming up and grabbing at Boo?
8. Up to ten nappies a day… isn’t that what the advert says? Ten nappies… that’s a slow day for us!
9. Little fingernails are sharp! Wow, they can be serious weapons and they always seem to find delicate skin…. just under you eye for example, or necks.
10. Crawling is a super efficient way to get where you want to go, how fast!!!
11.  Mummy’s and Daddy’s phones taste nice, and no babies aren’t fooled by toy phone alternatives… they know!
Mums' Days
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